Handmaidens - Stewardship Issues and Info

Handmaidens

Stewardship Issues & Info

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Just a Thought...
By Staff Writer Sharon Barrett

With the way we live, and the cost of living, it is no wonder we are so busy trying to make ends meet. Busy with family, and friends, and church and general responsibilities.. The nice thing about being busy is God is busy too, but never too busy for us. He always takes time to hear our prayers, answer our prayers, and help us even before we ask him for help. He keeps and eye on each and everyone of us. Just a wonderful thought that God can be trusted, relied upon.

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Bits of Useful Info

For the Investor:

CBS Market Watch covers the stock market, the bond market, mutual funds, and most else that might interest an investor. You can read the articles, follow the links, sign up for the email newsletter, fight in the discussion area, and see IPO pricings.

Another good place for investors to know about is .

For the Internet User:

NBC Internet joins free ISP trend
NBC Internet became the latest major Web brand to attempt to broaden its service portfolio and pull in new members by offering free Internet access through an ad-supported service. NBC Internet (NBCI), a unit of General Electric (GE) said it's teaming up with http://Spinway.com to offer free, nationwide Internet access service to the roughly 12 million registered members of its Xoom.com community. The new service will spotlight NBCi's Snap Internet portal as its default front-end. NBCi will have a minority equity stake in Spinway.com in exchange for distribution. Terms of the agreement were not disclosed.

Lycos' free Net-access service
Lycos (LCOS) announced the launch of Lycos Free Internet Access, a no cost dial-up access offering made possible through an agreement with 1stUp.com Corp. Both companies have CMGI (CMGI) as a major investor. Local access numbers for the Lycos service will cover 95 percent of the United States, and the company said international service may also be offered. It will be supported by advertising. Spinway, the company behind the free Net service offered by Kmart Corp. (KM) is expected to offer a similar service for NBC Internet's (NBCI) http://xoom.com . Spinway introduced Kmart's service called BlueLight with Kmart and Yahoo (YHOO) in December. It has reportedly attracted almost 1 million subscribers.

(The above articles courtesy of Tipworld)

For the Wage Earner:

Vault.com helps calculate self-worth

What's your market value? Vault.com, a publisher of career counseling and job search information, can help you find out whether you're underpaid.

Submit your resume to http://www.Vault.com/links/AIW and indicate what kind of new job you'd like. Vault.com will send the information to a consultant for a review. Vault.com co-founder Hussam Hamadeh said Tuesday the resulting analysis of strengths, weakness and salary range is then posted online. In its first week, the "Am I Worthy" service has received more than 1,000 resumes, he said in an interview with CBS.MarketWatch.com.

Hamadeh said one resume poster got a job interview and a job offer. In another case, a woman identifying herself as a Harvard MBA graduate, seeking a mergers and acquisitions vice presidency post, was deemed "not worthy" by the Vault.com expert, primarily because she has only five years' experience. Reviews of the resumes are offered by what Hamadeh called experts, including compensation analysts and job recruiters. "It takes courage to put yourself on the site," he said, "and there's a lot of voyeur interest in reading what people have to say about themselves, and in what others have to say too."

HOAXES AND URBAN LEGENDS

VIRUS HOAXES

God's Voice Mail
Submitted by F. Bills

We have all learned to live with "voice mail" as a necessary part of modern life. But have you wondered, what if God decided to install voice mail?"

Imagine praying and hearing this:
Thank you for calling My Father's House.
Please select one of the following options:
Press I for Requests
Press 2 for Thanksgiving
Press 3 for Complaints
Press 4 for All Other Inquiries.

What if God used the familiar excuse ...
"I'm sorry, all of our angels are busy helping other sinners right now. However, your prayer is important to us and will be answered in the order it was received, so please stay on the line"

Can you imagine getting these kinds of responses as you call God in Prayer:

If you would like to speak to: Gabriel, Press 1 For Michael, Press 2 For a directory of other Angels, Press 3 If you would like to hear King David sing a Psalm while you are holding please press 4.

To find out if a loved one has been assigned to Heaven, Press 5, enter his or her Social Security number, then press the pound key. (If you get a negative response, try area code 666.)

For reservations at "My Father's House" please enter: JOHN followed by 316.

For answers to nagging questions about dinosaurs, the age of the earth and where Noah's Ark is, please wait until you arrive here.

Our computers show that you have already prayed once today. Please hang up and try again tomorrow.

This office is closed for the weekend to observe a religious holiday. Please pray again Monday after 9:30 AM.

If you need emergency assistance when this office is closed, contact your local pastor.

THANK GOD, HE DOESN'T HAVE VOICE MAIL AND HE LISTENS WHEN WE PRAY!!!!!

Mergers to Ponder

In the wake of the MCI WorldCom/Sprint deal, here are some other mergers we might be seeing:

Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W.R. Grace merge to become Hale Mary Fuller Grace.

Polygram Records, Warner Brothers, and Keebler Crackers merge to become Polly-Warner-Cracker.

3M and Goodyear merge to become MMMGood.

John Deere and Abitibi-Price merge to become Deere Abi.

Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining merge to become Zip Audi Do Da.

Honeywell, Imasco, and Home Oil merge to become Honey I'm Home.

Denison Mines and Alliance and Metal Mining merge to become MineAll Mine.

Federal Express and UPS merge to become FED UP

Xerox and Wurlitzer will merge and begin manufacturing reproductive organs.

Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will merge and become Fairwell Honeychild

3M, J.C. Penney and the Lyric Opera Company will merge and become 3 Penney Opera

Knott's Berry Farm and the National Organization for Women will merge and become Knott NOW!

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