Handmaidens - Love & Marriage Issues

April 17, 2001

Love & Marriage Issues

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Just A Thought
By Staff Writer Sharon Barrett

Galatians 6:2 "Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ."

To carry one another's burdens means to not just think about them, or to pray about them, but to help each one as he/she needs to be helped. It also means if we are trusted with a secret a friends tells us, we are not to go around telling everyone we see or another friend. Confidence in our sisters is vital if we are to carry each others burdens. Sacrificing and serving others is what the Lord has placed before us, is it a law - yes? A written law!

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Why Abstinence?
By Mike Stine of www.spreadinglight.com

Editor's Note: While this article addresses important issues relating to sexual purity and is by a Christian writer, it avoids any discussion of God's word on the subject, perhaps in an effort to more effectively sway the secular audience for whom it was originally written. So, while every point below is well taken, I would stress the most vital argument of all is that sex outside of marriage is SIN of an especially vile nature... read Paul on the subject!

Why abstinence? This is the question we all must first answer concerning this topic. Why should we bother promoting it at all? Do we have reason to believe this is the best way, or are we simply old fashioned and haven't accepted our changing culture?

Abstinence is a great need in America today. Sex outside of marriage leads to numerous problems, all of which can be avoided if one simply has the self-control to wait.

I'll start with the easiest to see and most obvious reason for abstinence, STD's. One doesn't need to know a lot of statistics to say that STD's are quite prevalent today. Certainly there are some ways to help stop STD's, such as condoms, that lowers the risk significantly. However, none of these are foolproof. Much is already known about the dangers of STD’s and it isn’t the goal of this article to list all the dangers. My goal is to give reasons for abstinence and I can safely say that assuming there is no drug use, abstinence is the only way a person can be 100% sure they will not acquire an STD.

Another reason for abstinence is pregnancy. This is for much the same reason as to prevent STD’s. There are numerous forms of birth control but the only way one can be sure to not get pregnant (or get someone else pregnant) is to not have sex.

Perhaps the more lasting effect of sex outside of marriage though is what it does to the emotions. This is probably the most commonly overlooked one as well. We reason that if we can’t see it immediately or if we can’t see it at all, it must not exit, but this is not the case. When two people have sex, there is a bond between them. Within the confines of marriage this is a very good thing. But when it is played out before marriage, the bond is still there. If a person then leaves their partner, they leave behind essentially a piece of themselves that they cannot retrieve.

Virginity is a gift that a person can only give one partner, their first. It is a very special gift because this was the way it was intended to be. When a person has multiple partners, sex is cheapened and it becomes simply a means of self-gratification. Often there is no love in the relationship, or certainly not as there should be.

A friend recently related to me about their own most recent relationship. Not only had sex become a rather pointless matter of self-gratification, the relationship itself had become the same. There was no love, and even little communication, simply sex when the two were together. I assure you that this isn’t the way sex was meant to be.

Another problem related to me recently, backing up my own prior knowledge, is that of a partner’s faithfulness. Outside of marriage, there are numerous reasons to doubt that person will remain faithful to their current partner. When there is little love, or perhaps even communication, what reason is there to believe that a partner will remain faithful when all they really seek is to please themselves. My friend questioned how many people their partner would end sleeping with while gone away for three weeks. Obviously this has numerous emotional consequences, as well as does much damage to a relationship.

These are just a few of the problems that people who have sex outside of marriage encounter. Each problem is a reason for which we promote abstinence as the best choice for people. Sex is wonderful when placed inside the proper context of marriage. Outside of it, it can lead to emotional stress, heartache, pregnancy, and even sickness and death in the form of an STD. When we wake up to these consequences we’ll see a real change in the world. It is my hope that we will wake up in time before the consequences rule our lives.

Diary of a Newlywed
Submitted by Staff Writer Sharon Barrett

Dear Diary:

Monday: Now home from honeymoon and settled in our new home. It's fun to cook for Bob. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said, "Beat 12 eggs separately," The neighbors were nice enough to loan me some extra bowls.

Tuesday: Bob wanted fruit salad for supper. The recipe said, "Serve without dressing." So I didn't dress. What a surprise when Bob brought a friend home for supper.

Wednesday: A good day for rice. Recipe said, "Wash thoroughly before steaming the rice." it seemed kinda silly, but I took a bath. I can't say it improved the rice any.

Thursday: Today Bob asked for salad again. I tried a new recipe. It said, "Prepare ingredients, then toss on a bed of lettuce one hour before serving. Which is what led up to Bob asking me why I was rolling around in the garden?

Friday: I found an easy recipe for cookies. It said, "Put all ingredients in bowl and beat it," There must have been something wrong with this recipe. When I got back, everything was the same as when I left.

Saturday: Bob did the shopping today and brought home a chicken. He asked me to dress it for Sunday. (oh boy). For some reason Bob keeps counting to ten.

Sunday: Bob's folks came to dinner. I wanted to serve roast. All I could find was hamburger. Suddenly I had a flash of genius. I put the hamburger in the oven and set the controls for roast. It still came out hamburger, much to my disappointment.

Good night, Dear Diary. This has been a very exciting week. I am eager for tomorrow to come so I can try out a new recipe on Bob. If we could just get a bigger oven, I would like to surprise him with "Chocolate Moose".

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